The silence was loud when my baby was born.
But her cries penetrated deep inside my heart.
I laughed when I saw her.
She was so beautifully perfect.
She opened her mouth wide and her voice was music to my ears.
I was "allowed" to call my parents and tell them that I had given birth. A few hours later they arrived and I proudly showed them my healthy baby girl.
After they had gone, I lay back on my pillows and felt happy.
And then M came in . He had taken his mother home, and then returned to see the baby.
He came in from the nursery and sat down on the chair next to my bed.
There was no small talk, his words came out sharp, full of red anger.
"The baby looks like a mouse", he snarled.
"This is what you give me, an ugly mouse?" his blue eyes turned dark with rage.
"What kind of woman are you, you dont even know how to give birth to a pretty baby"!
And with those words he stormed out.
This time the tears flowed.
His words reverberated in my brain until I could no longer think clearly.
My soul was drowning in sorrow and sadness.
I had given birth not five hours ago, and I could not cope with M's anger.
I allowed the tears to flow.
I could not sleep that night, I cried for all the pain and suffering I had experienced since I married M, 10 months earlier.
I cried and I cried.
And I begged Hashem to save me from this evil man who was my husband.
But her cries penetrated deep inside my heart.
I laughed when I saw her.
She was so beautifully perfect.
She opened her mouth wide and her voice was music to my ears.
I was "allowed" to call my parents and tell them that I had given birth. A few hours later they arrived and I proudly showed them my healthy baby girl.
After they had gone, I lay back on my pillows and felt happy.
And then M came in . He had taken his mother home, and then returned to see the baby.
He came in from the nursery and sat down on the chair next to my bed.
There was no small talk, his words came out sharp, full of red anger.
"The baby looks like a mouse", he snarled.
"This is what you give me, an ugly mouse?" his blue eyes turned dark with rage.
"What kind of woman are you, you dont even know how to give birth to a pretty baby"!
And with those words he stormed out.
This time the tears flowed.
His words reverberated in my brain until I could no longer think clearly.
My soul was drowning in sorrow and sadness.
I had given birth not five hours ago, and I could not cope with M's anger.
I allowed the tears to flow.
I could not sleep that night, I cried for all the pain and suffering I had experienced since I married M, 10 months earlier.
I cried and I cried.
And I begged Hashem to save me from this evil man who was my husband.
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