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 Dear Sexual Abuser,

I was having a hard time at home. Abusive parents I was a broken soul. You approached me, promised to help me. I opened up to you. Confided in you. You told me I could trust you. I believed you.

I vividly remember the first time you touched me. We sat on that living room couch of yours and I bared my heart to you. You said you felt so close to me. You wanted to show how much you loved me.

My mind refused to acknowledge the abuse. I felt nothing. I was numb. I went to a place inside myself that you could not reach.I was young and naive. I let my guard down. I thought I was safe with you. You preyed on my vulnerability. You knew I had no one else to turn to.


Sometimes at night I lie in bed and I think about you. I wonder if you ever lie in bed and think about me? Have you once thought about the consequences of your actions? I have spent years ashamed and embarrassed. I feel guilty, I believe it is my fault. I looked up to you. I respected you. I blame myself for needing you.You stole a part of me. 

The little bit of trust I had left you tore that from me. School was my only safe place and you ruined it for me. Why did you do it? Why me? Do you know how much pain you caused me? Did you enjoy the power over me? Did you want to hurt me?  Did you ever care about me? Was I just someone to be used? Did I mean anything to you?  I spend a lot time seeking answers, digging up suppressed memories buried deeply in my mind. I am still searching. 

But I want to tell you something sexual predator. I may be having an extremely hard time right now but although you have tainted my past I will not let you hold me back from my future. 

One day I will get past this. One day I will heal. One day all this pain will be a distant memory. But you - you will forever remain a sick person. A sick person who preyed on innocent defenceless children. 


I hope you go to hell!
 


Comments

margaret
08/24/2012 22:07

Been there done that- I know how you feel and the sleep you lose--fuck those perps, just don't let it happen again- if it does--throw them out, and fuck them on the way out like they fucked you--- put a lein on thier car , get the "cousin: who will take care of things--believe me going through the courts is not justice-- there are 3 forms of Justice-- Personal justice- Social Justive- like with the courts and God Justice. I have learned to live with the latter - You fuck an innocent person-- it comes back to you.

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elizabett
04/12/2013 11:48

But if the abusers are protected by silence they can continue to destroy other lives. Even if the courts don't provide adequate justice, public charges can expose the criminals - so potential victims may be forewarned.

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